Key Questions to Ask Before Buying that Present
I’ve shared many potential gift ideas with you in the last week.
All of these are organized by age and with your child’s learning and growth in mind.
And yet inevitably, you will find yourself considering one of the many adorable, playful, appealing options available at your local children’s shop or Target, in a beloved bookstore or on Amazon.
Here are key questions to ask before you step up to the register or check out that cart!
Is this toy developmentally meaningful? Why is this toy of value to your child as they learn and grow? The answer should not simply be “they love x character or y movie.” New, heavy wax crayons support development of the hands; a puzzle might help your child develop visual sequencing skills and hand-eye coordination. A book about different types of families offers your child relational learning; a book about winter helps them understand their physical world.
Can this item be used in different ways for months to come? Most craft kits can just be used once or a few times, but a peeler can peel carrots, sweet potatoes, and beets all winter. A good set of paints can be used again and again; a beloved book can be revisited in many ways.
Does my child have something like this already? If we want our children to stop seeking novelty, we have to be willing to stop offering it.
Is this item well-made? Young children are sensorial learners. Be mindful of how much of that sensory input is coming from plastic. It is better to have one lovely, carefully-made doll than many made of lesser quality. One set of quality colored pencils offers a child a superior experience of drawing and will last for a long while.
Do I really want to give my child this gift, or am I just trying to make the winter holidays ‘special’? Less is more for your child’s development. Have courage and stand by that statement. You can make the holidays special in so many ways. We don’t want to give children the impression that we value quantity over quality, that accumulating more is what makes an experience special. Particularly as the coming weeks unfold, resist the urge to do and gift more.
Look at the gifts you are considering sharing. Are you clear about their value to your child?
If you are looking to feel further empowered, consider Maria Montessori’s words about the real consequences when we offer toys without intention:
“It is a common, but false, belief that the child, who has the most toys, the most help, should also be the most developed. Instead of that, the confused multitude of objects with which he is surrounded only aggravates the chaos of his mind and further discourages him.”
Can you see how that would be true for your child…and can you help them move away from that confusing multitude this holiday season?